I'ma keep running

In my last post I mentioned that my body was responding to the injectables. It was a long 20+ days but things were moving in the right direction. Well, after the positive response, the follicles on the ovaries are stimulated and there are [approximately] 4 million additional hoops that need to be jumped through in order to get pregnant. 

Our first IUI did not work. The silver lining is this; we responded and arrived at the point where we could give it a shot!

The news was hard to hear. PJ brought home pizza, we drank good wine and cuddled with our girl; the best cure for a positively shitty day.

Just about the time where we came to accept our failure and were ready to move on, we find out that our next cycle is cancelled. Cancelled. Cancelled due to cysts on my ovaries. I'm telling you, infertility is not for the faint of heart.

This turn of events is not ideal but there is nothing we can do [have to keep telling myself that] so we keep our heads up and keep on keeping on. Keep our heads up and obviously take advice from Beyonce. 

Switching gears. Tyler's Married!

WOAH.

My little brother is hitched and we had a great time celebrating. I laughed, cried and was so proud of him. 

rehearsal dinner

sibs

best of the best

one back, one forward, one back, back, back

The other day in one of my many tearful calls to my husband after a doctor's appointment I said, 'who needs valleyfair when you have the rollercoaster that is our fertility'. It's up and it's way, way down - and I never ever know what's going to happen when I walk into that clinic. 

This cycle started on Femara and an increased dosage from last cycle's try. 

• Appointment 1: Doc didn't seeing any follicle growth and was visibly disappointed with the progress.
• Appointment 2: There was a little something there, enough that we could schedule another ultrasound (and get my hopes up).
• Appointment 3: A little follicle growth from appt 2. We decided to give it 5 days, ultrasound again and see where we were at.
• Appointment 4: Growth had halted. Cancelled cycle. See you next 'month' (I use month in quotes because for normal women, cycles are a month. For me; they could be years).

What a kick in the gut!

When the nurse called to give me the news she stuck to the party line in the infertility world ... "your best bet here is to try IVF". 

Gee, thanks. Call and give me terrible news and throw that at me... in a voicemail. 

What now?

Since there is not a response to the medicine that we're currently using we will have to jump up to injectables or gonadotropins. 

And, because it's better to laugh then cry - here is some infertility humor. Enjoy.

cycle 10/ month 21

My last post was less than a month ago, which shouldn't be a huge accomplishment. This cycle was a roller coaster of emotions:

Started on August 30 with the normal routine; ultrasound, plan, go. We decided to go with Femara of 5mg for five days and then reevaluation of what was going on.

On September 12, I had my normal ultrasound which showed no growth of follicles and I left the office thinking that we were done again this cycle. I got a phone call from Dr. E later in the afternoon and she suggested we strongly consider IVF since she's having a difficult time making me ovulate. Phil and I have discussed IVF in the past and it's absolutely off the table at the current moment - it's not even up for discussion. This was particularly devastating to me: you can't make me ovulate? this is my only option? what? She made the determination that we were going to go with a 'stair-step'. This means that instead of taking provera and waiting for AF we were going to jump right back into Femara and do another 5 day dose but at 7.5 mg this time. Drugs, ultrasound, repeat.

On September 23, another ultrasound which showed two follicles of measurable size; a 11.5 mm and a 15 mm and good lining! It was time to use the stored HCG (Ovidrel) shot that we've had in the fridge since May! That night, Phil followed the instructions and stabbed me with the needle. The following two days, the 24th and 25th, I had two positive Ovulations tests - that's new!

Then, I (im)patiently waited for October 7 to take a pregnancy test. Negative. Negative. Negative.

Are we bummed? Yes, of course. But, we have a plan that 'worked' and hopefully it will again. This treatment coupled with getting my Prolactin levels figured out could be a winning combination. Fingers crossed, right? Here we go - on to the next one.

bummed, but optimistic

We are currently wrapping up cycle 8 of our baby journey. You may think to yourself, '8 cycles.. 8 months. that's not bad'. My cycles are not short and sweet. My longest cycle was 135 days and the average of all 8 is 70 days. Now that we are at the RE we are a little more regular than before. But to us 8 cycles = 19 months.

This cycle was our first medicated cycle and it was a learning experience for both of us. We learned that drugs make me crazy, Philip is the best husband ever and that it takes me 27 minutes to get to the doc in Minneapolis. We also talked alot about follicles.

Ovarian follicles are the basic units of female reproductive biology, each of which is composed of roughly spherical aggregations of cells found in the ovary. They contain a single oocyte (immature ovum or egg). These structures are periodically initiated to grow and develop, culminating in ovulation of usually a single competent oocyte in humans. These eggs/ova are developed only once every menstrual cycle (e.g. once a month in humans). via Wikipedia

We are done with this cycle because I did not have enough mature follicles to move ahead with the IUI. I am bummed, but optimistic (hence the title). We will meet with the doctor and reevaluate everything - what do we do now? up the meds? change meds? These will be all the questions that we ask when we go back.

Schedule of Cycle 8

CD2:  Ultrasound

CD3-7: Clomid 50mg

CD12: Ultrasound

CD15: Ultrasound

CD18: Ultrasound

Thanks all for reading. Have a great weekend and keep enjoyin' that summer.